How I contribute to my daughter's neuroses

Of course when we took Jack shopping to spend his Christmas money, we took Olivia too. We went to the Target on the South Side of town. (Yes we have more than one Target that we can go to. In fact we have three but one we hardly ever go to any more and then there is the one we normally go to and then for special times we go to the one in South Durham. See this is what happens when you move away from your family, the Target stores become your family. Oh I am sooo messed up aren’t I?)
Anyhow, we took Olivia to spend her Christmas money and it was a difficult thing for me because I wanted her to spend it on whatever she wanted and yet I wanted her to get something she would actually play with and not something similar to something she already had. This meant steering her away from baby dolls, stuffed animals and Polly Pockets. As soon as we walked into Target, Olivia spotted a small stuffed dog in the dollar section.
-Can I please spend my money on this Momma?
Ok it is only a dollar and we do not need another small stuffed animal but fine.
– Yes Olivia you may buy that.
Later when we are in the toy section, even though she has not picked out anything else to buy, Olivia wanted to check out.
-But Olivia don’t you want to spend some more of your money?
-You mean I have enough money to buy more than the dog??
-Yes.
-OK but can’t I buy this first and then we look.
I think she was apprehensive about actually getting to buy the dog. She feels maybe I am just telling her she can buy something else as a way to interest her in something new and then somehow she will not get to buy the dog. (She has issues with trust. If we don’t travel the same road home from church that we travel every Sunday, she is convinced we are lost or we just have no idea what we are doing. She is never convinced that every thing is all right until she sees the house. )
I assure her she can have the dog no matter what and that we do not need to check out yet. She agrees but refuses to leave the dog in the cart and instead carries it with her through the aisles.
She shows me things that she likes and waits for me to indicate if it is ok for her to buy them.
-Do you want to buy that Olivia? I ask in an encouraging voice.
-Do I have enough money?
-Yes.
-Maybe I want to.
-OK but you did get some a lot like that for Christmas.
-That’s true.
-But you can get it if you really want to.
-Well, can I keep looking?
-Yes, we have plenty of time.
-Ok I will keep looking.
She decided on several things and then changes her mind. Sometimes because of something I say , sometimes just because she sees something she likes better.
Finally she had a Littlest Pet Shop Doggie Diner in the cart and told me that was what she really wanted.
Just then Eric came in the aisle and asked Olivia if she has seen the Playmobile Unicorn Castle a few aisles down. The words -Unicorn Castle- were just too exciting to ignore and so Olivia and I went to check it out. She looked at the castle but she was more interested in a playhouse. She has a play house. A nice little wooden one with a cute felt doll family. So I asked her what she really liked about the playhouse. What made it different from the house she already had and it was the little baby that came with the house. So I agreed to the house. We brought it back to the cart and I saw a little house with a baby from a series of toys she already has. I showed that to her and explained that it was cheaper so she could walk away with money to spend another day. She liked that idea and so we exchanged the playmobile house for the Sweet Streets house. And that is what she bought.
When we finally checked out and made it to the car Olivia said – BOY AM I TIRED. (she always talks loud, especially when she is tired)
-Why are you so tired?
-Because deciding what to buy has WORN me out. First this thing and then that and then something else. I thought I might never decide.Next time we will just leave after she picks up the $1.00 dog…